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The Young Grieve, Too
Jun 09, 2002

Hello all, I am Julie, I am 17 years old, and I live in West Virginia. While most 17 year olds are happy and free, I am depressed and grieving. I have had six miscarriages. My first, Alvin, was 6 months along. My second, Caleb, was 14 weeks along. My third, Sarah, was 12 weeks along. My fourth Emmanuel was 4 months along. My fifth Taylor was 8 weeks along. And my sixth, Casey was 7 weeks along. Until recently the problem was not discovered for the recurrances. But I finally found a doctor who cared and found out I have a cist the size of a large mans fist on my right overy. They said that because of the size it has killed my last few babies. And that with each miscarriage it was blocking blood in my tubes. And to think that not one ob/gyn doctor that I had seen knew what the problem was. I had had a general laproscopy last year and they supposedly didn't see the cist. The doctor I am seeing now said the cist has had to have been there for almost two years now! And because of a few doctors stupidity I have lost my precious Angels. I having surgery to remove my cist on the 14th of June. I didn't know whether to put Casey's name in as a miscarriage yet or not. As of right now I am 6 weeks along with Casey. But they are going to have to take the baby at my surgery and the surgery cannot be postponed. I was told that even if I could have postponed this surgery I would have lost the baby within the next 2 or 3 weeks. I blame myself for not having a healthy body to protect my babies with. No one I know understands my constant pain. The father of my last four Angels is a distant and some what unemotional person. He is here for me, but only so much. I have been in a support group for close to a year and then I dropped it the other day when I was told I was too young to grieve my children and I wasn't a Mother. I am hoping to find people no matter what the age or anything that have expierienced multiple losses also and maybe we can offer support to one another.
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