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Grief Doesn't End
Nov 09, 2002

On October 31,2000 my husband and I decided to take our girls out trick or treating we went to a neighborhood and stayed out for about and hour.When we got back home I was hurting in my stomach so I went to bed the next day I had fluid leaking I called the doctor and he said it was just my bladder so the next day I had an appoitment.I told him I thought my water had broken and he said it is just your bladder I was also hurting and had alot of pressure.He said it was just my uterus stretching he said go home and take tylenol.that evening it got worse so I called the nurse and told her I was hurting bad and she just take some more tylenol So I did. About two hours later I went to the bathroom and my son was born.My mom called the Doctors office and they said"tell her to bring what fell out of her"I started bleeding real bad by the time I got to the hospital my blood pressure was 70 flat. I had to have an emergency D and E .I was in so much pain that I couldnt walk.At first they ask if I wanted to see my son and I said yes but I didnt want to hold him as soon as I saw him I knew I had to hold him.He weighed 2.3 ounces and was 5 1/2 inches long. He was fully formed and had his dads crooked toe.We had a memoral service for him.I am thankful that I have three beautiful girls.Amanda 9 Jessica 6 and Hannah 13 months.The grief doesnt end I long to see my son and hold him one last time.My daughter Hannah was a twin .I lost her twin at 7 weeks .Now that Hannah is born I see how much I missed with the other two.I know one day I will get to see my other children who are in heaven one day.
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