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My Heart Aches
Nov 01, 2002
I have just recently had my first and hopefully only m/c. When I found out that I was pregnant I was ecstatic. I already have 2 children who are my life, but they are both very sick. I thought that this baby was going to be my "perfect" child, one that I wouldn't have to constantly worry about. I have been through so much in the last 11 months, I wonder how much more I can possibly take. My heart is aching for the baby I lost more because no one is grieving with me. Everyone feels that I should just continue on with my life no big deal. It is a very big deal to me and I can't help but feel mad at everyone for not seeing and respecting my pain. I believe that I am a really good mommy and I just don't understand why God has made me suffer so much. I am jealous of my sister because I long for what she has. She has 3 perfect children, who pratically never even get colds, 3 perfect pregnancies, I am so jealous. My husband will never understand, and I am afraid that this will tear us apart. I find myself constantly coming on to this web site because I find my only solace here. Thank you all for your love and support.
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