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Tragedy, Hope, and Love
Dec 01, 2002

In December of 2001 I was raped by a nameless, faceless stranger. Two weeks later I feared pregnancy. 4 Weeks later I learned I was going to have a baby. I worried about what this child would suffer because of the free will of his father. Would my family see him as the enemy? Would friends look upon him with pity? Would I hate him for what his father did? It took very little time for me to realize that the answer was no. I already had a daughter that was the light of my life and I couldn't see feeling any differently towards him. We did all the usuall prep and planning. Spent a small fortune on everything from nursing clothes to cloth diapers. On September 19, 2002 I gave birth to my beautiful son, Karl Joseph. He was 6lbs 8 ozs. 18 3/4" and stillborn. Just the morning before we had seen him on the ultrasound and had pictures stashed away for the baby book. If only they would have seen the cord wrapped tightly around his neck. If only there would have been something that I could have done. If only. He was so perfect. Curly ash blonde hair. Deep blue eyes. His Grandma's hands. I don't blame anyone because we are all just human, no matter how high tech and I try to console myself with the fact that we have a loving and caring God and that now my Karl Joseph is with the best father he could ever have. With tragedy came hope. With hope came love. With love comes eternity.
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